sassybabushka:

When my friend was in fourth grade her teacher asked for an example of irony, and she answered “Harry Potter searching for the final horcrux, but he is the final horcrux” and her teacher started screaming and said “I DIDN’T FINISH THE BOOK OH MY GOD!”

shisnojon:

Babies are dicks

shisnojon:

Babies are dicks

prussian-lullaby:

monocromas:

deathrock:

becausebirds:

The blackest bird there ever was. It’s black on the outside from head to toe, and black on the inside with its meat and organs.

It’s called the Ayam Cemani from Indonesia, and they’re $2,500 a pop. Their bones are black, too. The only part of them that’s not black is their blood 

That’s metal.

The biggest, blackest cock

So the drugstore I was in today had a perfume display. Here are some of the perfumes I came across.

jessicarabbit:

tenr0se:

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Dirt

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Funeral Home

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Weed

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Grass

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Holy Water

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Laundromat

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Leather

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New Zealand 

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Play-Doh 

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Wet Garden

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Tomato

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Suntan Lotion

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Sex on the Beach

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Riding Crop

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Soap

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And Finally, Swimming Pool

"No officer, for the last time, I did not smoke weed. Thats just my new perfume, cannabis flower"

punk-roque:

when i have a crush on someone i can never tell if they have a mutual crush on me or if i’m just noticing and exaggerating every bit of attention i’m getting from them and amplifying it into something it’s not

yaridansei19:

Damn Family Guy may be stupid sometimes…but this shit is on. Point.

yipdeceiver:

ah yes. my great teenage years. corresponding with strangers about music on a website and never getting dressed. sweet memories

supernatural-mishamigo:

vvaddles:

theselener:

vvaddles:

would u rather eat a pound of bricks or a matter baby??

whats a matter baby

nothing sweetie whats a matter with you??

I did not see that coming

passinnotesinsecrecy:

dylan o’brien is the reason the heart eye emoji was created

*rattles chains* student loooooOOOOOoo000oOOOo0Oo0Ooans
Anonymous

Frightening tbh